Last Updated on April 24, 2025 by Jan Barley
Choose a life design and your life stops being something that happens to you. Though goodness knows it can seem like our lives are out of control sometimes, it’s more a case of becoming aware of how much we can influence our experiences.
If you’re anything like me, I am not short of ideas. Sometimes, my head buzzes with flashes of brilliance. However, implementing those ideas is a different story. I am neurodivergent, so creating structure can be problematic for me.
I’m learning to prioritise my ideas based on what will “move the needle.” In other words, I need to stop chasing shiny objects that are a waste of time and instead focus on doing the tasks that enable me to make progress, particularly in my goal to become financially free.
These four steps are how I better manage my mind to achieve the things I need and want to do to better design my life. You can choose a life design that aligns perfectly with your deepest desires.
1. Identify Your Options
Jot down all the potential options you have. You might start by creating a mind map where you write all the ideas on paper in no particular order. After that, pull out the ones that are genuine opportunities and create a priority list.
This exercise stops you from reacting to external influences and steers you towards becoming proactive. It enables you to choose how you spend your time.
There is no shortage of opportunities, but we can get trapped in “decision overwhelm” and end up doing nothing or chasing the wrong thing.
2. Narrow Down Your Options
If the brain feels overwhelmed, it naturally distracts you from those uncomfortable feelings. You find yourself switching on Netflix, eating a bucket of chocolate or doing something you find easy and enjoyable.
What I have learned is that I avoid doing the tough things. The problem with that is those tricky tasks often take me closer to my goal. For instance, I procrastinated on a task for several months because I knew there were technical aspects to overcome. I was experiencing brain fog and kept putting it off for fear of making a mistake.
What helped me overcome this challenge was to break down the entire task into bite-sized chunks. I accepted it was OK to do one small thing daily because it eventually got me to complete the task. Yay!
We are all different. Writing a list of pros and cons might work for you, or brainstorming with a friend might help.
3. Making A Choice
The most powerful question to determine how to choose from multiple options is to ask, “What do I want?”
Sit quietly, close your eyes and ask this question until you are 100% clear on your objective, dream or goal. Listen to your heart or your gut, but be aware that your brain can talk you out of taking “big” steps because it wants to keep you safe. So what you think is a gut feeling is your brain being a scaredy cat.
After determining what you want, the next question is, “Why do I want it?” This aspect is super important because what we think we want is often not our dream. It can be social conditioning, peer pressure, FOMO or something else.
For example, my dream of financial freedom is underpinned by a deep desire to be free. I’ve felt like that forever. I want to have time to do hobbies, buy a house (free me from rent) and enjoy meandering through my days without having to report to anyone else. I also want to spend less time on my laptop.
However, underpinning all of our dreams is a desire to be happy. We all want to be happy. We believe achieving “something” we prioritise will give us that.
4. Let Go and Move On
After you have made a decision, let it go. Don’t worry whether you have done the right thing. Stand by your choice. If it falls apart, it wasn’t meant for you, and you know what not to do next time. You are unique. What works for one person isn’t right for another.
There are always other opportunities. We are in the flow of abundance. Let go of regret. Shrug your shoulders and move on. Listen to your intuition, your soul and your feelings. Sometimes, when something I wanted doesn’t work out, I feel relieved. Then, something much better comes along. Learn to trust yourself and detach from outcomes.
The more you can let go and not attach meaning to attaining what you think you want, the happier you will be. You will learn to become adaptable, flexing into life like a wise guru.
Creating a life design isn’t complicated. It’s more about figuring out what matters to you and how you want to live. Sadly, many people go their entire lives swept along by external influences and only realise what happened when it’s too late to shape their lives the way they (actually) want it to be.
I hope this article has helped you choose a life design.
